Routines...

Written by Bonnie

Routines…..Schedules…..Lists….whatever you call them, they are important!

There are a lot of underlying aspects that are included in schedules and routines. Steps to take that make us feel better about ourselves. Time management opens up free-time and lessons anxiety. Goals, fighting procrastination and routines go hand in hand with self-esteem.

Set daily, weekly and long-term goals for yourself. When you accomplish your daily goals you are one step closer to reaching your weekly goal, and when you get to your weekly goal you are closer to your long term goal! Baby steps and setting obtainable goals are the key to your success!

Don’t say “I’m going to clean the house”, instead say “I am going to wipe down the sink” and the rest will follow. Make detailed lists: Wipe down sink, wipe down shower, clean toilet, clean floors, and take out laundry. Cross each off as they get done. When you’re done the bathroom is clean and your list is all crossed off! Feels good right?

Sometimes as mom’s we don’t feel like we are appreciated. Go ahead and save up your cleaning lists to show to your husband when he gets home. When you feel like you’re “not worth anything” go back and look at you’re crossed off lists and see all that you do accomplish and have accomplished!

Avoid procrastination! It does nothing but cause anxiety! Maintain your focus! Don’t put something off when you know you shouldn’t. Be aware of the ease you feel when you get your work done ahead of time or on schedule, as opposed to the anxiety you feel when you wait until the last minute. Think of this feeling the next time you want to procrastinate.

Routines and schedules are my rock! I never had a routine until I became a mom. I know exactly when it happened too. I was sitting in that hospital bed with my new baby and the “breastfeeding expert” came to talk to me, with her feeding schedule and diaper check off list. Well that was it. Ever since November 18, 2005 I have had routine. It has remained constant but with change. Such as I still wake up at the crack of dawn and we still eat lunch at 12 noon, but naptimes have changed and the kids have weekly activities now. Also, when I started school again now, I got to put some “me time” into the routine, when I go online for school and when I write papers etc. Bottom line is I would be lost without my routine. I have been doing it so long now though, that when a “weird day” comes up, it’s really no problem to get back on track the next day.

Goal setting and routines help you maintain your focus. When you maintain focus, you succeed. When you succeed, your self-esteem rises. When your self-esteem rises, you have the desire to have more focus!

Here is an example of my routine/schedule:

Monday:

6 am-wake up, exercise, shower, have coffee, read the paper, and check email

7am- kids are up, clean them and feed them play and clean until noon

12 Noon – lunch time! Clean and play until naptime

2 pm- Naptime for kids and school time for me

5 pm- get kids up (if they aren’t already) start dinner

6 pm- eat dinner, play, and talk to husband J

8 pm- kids to bed finish up schoolwork, any cleaning, and hang with husband J

Tuesday:

6 am-wake up, exercise, shower, have coffee, read the paper, and check email

7 am- kids are up, clean them and feed them, and get crock pot going

10 am- Library time! Go to market, other errands, and home by noon

12 Noon – lunch time! Clean and play until naptime

1:30 pm- Naptime for kids and school time for me

3:30 pm– get kids up and dressed for gymnastics

4:30 pm- gymnastics until 5:30

6 pm- eat dinner, play, and talk to husband J

8 pm- kids to bed finish up schoolwork, any cleaning, and hang with husband J

Wednesday:

6 am-wake up, exercise, shower, have coffee, read the paper, and check email

7 am- kids are up, clean them and feed them and play

10 am – go to movies (free movies for kids in the summer)

12 Noon – lunch time! Clean and play until naptime

2 pm- Naptime for kids and school time for me

5 pm- get kids up (if they aren’t already) start dinner

6 pm- eat dinner, play, and talk to husband J

8 pm- kids to bed finish up schoolwork, any cleaning, and hang with husband J

Thursday:

6 am-wake up, exercise, shower, have coffee, read the paper, and check email

7 am- kids are up, clean them and feed them play and clean until noon

12 Noon – lunch time! Clean and play until naptime

2 pm- Naptime for kids and school time for me

5 pm- get kids up (if they aren’t already) start dinner

6 pm- eat dinner, play, and talk to husband J

8 pm- kids to bed finish up schoolwork, any cleaning, and hang with husband J

Friday:

6 am-wake up, exercise, shower, have coffee, read the paper, and check email

7 am- kids are up, clean them and feed them play and clean until noon

12 Noon – lunch time! Clean and play until naptime

2 pm- Naptime for kids and school time for me

5 pm- get kids up (if they aren’t already) start dinner

6 pm- eat dinner, play, and talk to husband J

8 pm- kids to bed finish up schoolwork, any cleaning, and hang with husband J

Saturday and Sunday:

Look for babysitters!

Have a date with husband J

Play as a family!

Get dinner schedule ready for the week!

Go to the market as a family!

Have husband J take kids out so MOM CAN HAVE ALONE TIME!

Watch all week as we explore different schedules, and different techniques. Join us tomorrow with a link to YOUR schedule!

What do I do with my kids?

This is a very common question in our house. I always wanted to be the mom with activities galore. A new project every day. And of course, with a perfectly clean house, well-dressed children, and plenty of time to relax. Hmmm… in what world?

My kids are 6, 41/2, and 3. The advantage to their closeness is that they usually play well together. There are times when I think I should be playing with them, but they are doing so well together…why interfere?

Here are some of the activities that we do, or need to do more of, in our house.

Kids learn best through Playing. It is their “job” to play! They learn interaction, social etiquette, and communication. They learn about their world and their place in it.

Play dough I do believe that Play dough is the best invention ever! It only takes about 10 minutes to make, and the kids play with it for HOURS! Not only is it a good “mommy needs to get stuff done” activity, but play dough is a great toy for building coordination, creativity, and learning. (Look for a great play dough recipe coming soon!)

Sorting There are a million ways to sort a million things! A fun game is to grab a bag of M&M’s or Skittles and some containers, and let the kids sort. They can sort by color and number. They can learn math. My next activity with my kids will involve skittles. I’ll post pics! Here’s my game plan.

McKenzie is 3. She will sort by color.

Michael is the 41/2 yr old. For him, I will put random numbers on a piece of paper, or in the bottom of a paper bowl, and have him put that many candies in.

Tanner is 6. He will work on his math, by setting up groupings, and working with a worksheet.

The really fun part is to see how quickly the candy is “Subtracted” into their mouths!

Music Music plays such an important role in our lives. Children love music. This is something that I need to improve in my house. When the kids are playing with their play dough, or sorting, soft music can play in the background! It can be classical; it can be a selection of fun kid songs. Music is proven to get your mind working, and developing. Dancing to the music helps physical development, as well as coordination. Letting them PLAY music is fun too! Have a craft day to make your own drums and maraca’s! Then have a parade or concert!

Cook together Kids in the kitchen can be a true adventure. Prepare for everything to take twice as long, and to be twice as messy! The benefits from this activity are enormous though. The kid’s excitement level is contagious, and will get all of you laughing. Math and science are found in the kitchen. Memories are made as the kitchen warms up, laughter and stories are shared, and something is created together.

Building chapels

I received this story in my email one day, and it made me cry. I hope it gives you some inspiration, and makes you want to do better.

Go hug your kids!

Washington National Cathedral

Invisible Mother

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store.

Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?'

Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all.

I'm invisible. The invisible Mom.

Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this?

Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?'

I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again.

She's going, she's going, she's gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England.

Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in.

I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well.

It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe.

I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription:

'To Charlotte, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.'

In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work:

No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names. These builders gave theirwhole lives for a work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.

A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it.'

And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.'

I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does.

No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.'

At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction.

But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride.

I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder.

As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home.

And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, 'You're gonna love it there.'

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.

Great Job, MOM! Share this with all the Invisible Moms you know. The Will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you. The Invisible Mother.

It's the things we achieve through God that gives us our joys in life.